Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Blogger Babes Bare All!

Apparently, it's Show-and-Tell Day in the academic feminist blogosphere. Missed the memo? Consider this your invitation to participate!

Our dear friend Historiann, whom we have never met in the dimension commonly referred to as Real Life, posted photographs this morning of herself and her husband frolicking in the Colorado wilderness. These are, as far as we know, the first images Historiann's readers have ever seen of the Real People behind the blog. To our surprise and considerable disappointment, Historiann is not wearing chaps or brandishing a lasso in the picture. On the other hand, the head-and-shoulders shot proves beyond the shadow of a doubt that our favorite tenured cowgirl has a very fine neck and a regal way of looking at a camera, which somehow does not surprise us. Think Audrey Hepburn, only outdoorsy-er.

Not to be outdone by our blog pal's sudden penchant for self-revelation, the Beach Blanket Bingo players of Roxie's World are pleased to offer this bodacious image of Moose last week in South Haven, MI, looking for all the world as if she is ready for the swimsuit competition in next year's Ms. Blogosphere pageant:


(Photo Credit: Little Sister of the Moosians, 7/4/11)

Yes, as a matter of fact, we have lost our minds. It could be the heat has gotten to us. It's hot as heck here in the national capital area today. We thought this photo might help local readers cool off. Also, we thought you'd get a kick out of seeing the reading glasses placed strategically in front of the giant sunglasses, not to mention the kind of high-octane reading material Moose takes with her to the beach. (Look, she had her Kindle with her, too, and actually read a screen or two of Sherry Turkle's Alone Together before nodding off in the sun!) We also felt it was important to immortalize the ridiculous floral bathing suit Moose was forced to buy out in New Mexico when she showed up at a hot springs spa that used to be sex-segregated and clothing-optional. That she is still wearing the suit nearly two years later proves that cheapness triumphs over vanity in la famillle Moosianne.

Mostly, though, we offer this shockingly revealing image as a way of commemorating the six-month anniversary of Moose's Lifestyle Adjustment Program. It's true. Six months ago today she walked into a meeting, stepped on a scale, and made a commitment to eating less, moving more, and feeling better. Tomorrow, she will walk back into a meeting, step on that same scale, and declare herself on maintenance. An important part of the journey will be over. A victory will be (sensibly) celebrated, and a new stage, more challenging in many ways for Moose than the effort to take off weight, will begin. To mark that transition, we offer a photograph, not to brag, shame, or even necessarily inspire, but simply to acknowledge and to remember: For one feisty middle-aged broad, this is what feeling better looks like.

Peace out, darlings. Be well.

8 comments:

  1. From one middle-aged broad to another: You look terrific! (And what a shame about leaving Brad. How will he go on???)

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  2. As do you, Audrey -- I mean, Historiann.

    Never having watched The Bachelor, Moose felt ill-equipped to appreciate the full depth of Brad's tragic loss. She was nonetheless riveted by the story as yet another example of the perilous state of postmodern heterosexuality. Suffice it to say, we think you picked the right moment to go gay, Historiann.

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  3. Yay that you're heading to maintenance! You've done so well - definitely something to be proud of!

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  4. Thanks! And thanks again for inspiring Moose to give WW a try. We're thinking the swimsuit competition in the Ms. Blogosphere pageant is going to be pretty stiff next year. See you on the runway! ;-)

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  5. The "People" magazine is a nice touch.

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  6. Gay is my new Weight Watchers, Roxie. Remember that old joke: how do you lose 180 unsightly pounds? . . .

    We should start a blogger meme: post a photo showing the blogger exercizing her right to bare arms! I've been invited to go shoot up a canyon round these parts (for realz, no joke) so maybe I'll post a photo from that adventure and live up to the double-entendre

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  7. Compared to some of the "celebrity" magazines PhysioWife reads, People is like motherfucken Foreign Affairs.

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  8. Love your meme idea, Historiann. Maybe we could follow it up with an actual (=virtual) Ms. Blogosphere pageant. PhysioProf, FratGuy, and Geoffrey could be the judges. And maybe, um, I dunno, Gwyneth Paltrow and Ellen.

    It had been a long, long time since Moose curled up with a copy of People, which she used to read religiously. Reading it made her feel old because she had no idea who most of the people being discussed were. On her planet, George Clooney is still the hot young guy.

    Poor Moose -- You can retool the body, but the mind is apparently less amenable to change.

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